“We set boundaries so we know what to do when we very much want to love those around us really well without losing ourselves in the process.”
Throughout my life, I’ve read many different non-fiction books that are attempting address difficult topics. But I’ve never read one that so clearly depicted the struggle of knowing when it is time to say goodbye to a toxic relationship. This is a topic that so often stays within the realm of marriage or workplace; but in her book, Good Boundaries and Goodbyes by Lysa Terkeurst, the author takes time to address what this looks like within the friendship context as well.
She tackles the lies that so many Christians believe such as “boundaries are selfish” or “I can’t give up on a relationship because that isn’t what Jesus would do”. There were times as I read that I felt God speaking so clearly right to my heart about lies I’d believed for many years. I think that most people can relate to the struggle of knowing when it’s time to give grace and when it’s time to stand up for oneself; so this book will certainly appeal to believers in all walks of life.
The progression of the book flowed from the Biblical basis for boundaries to how they can be set practically in every day situations to recognizing when it’s time to step away from a relationship. Terkeurst shares her deeply personal experiences along each step of the way and shows how God can bring beauty from even the most difficult circumstances. The scriptures and stories are also paired with advice from her counselor, who brings a psychological perspective to the table. And all of it is framed with grace for the individual reader and encouragement to not give up on working through such difficult topics.
I highly recommend this book for anyone who is looking to strengthen current relationships or mourn lost ones, or even those who are wondering if it’s time to set stricter boundaries or say a goodbye.
Kathleen Bird 